It's so easy to become offended. It actually comes pretty natural. Someone says something. You feel it's directed at you Strong reaction follows No need to react, it's got nothing to do with you as a person Imagine some remarks about academic work versus manual one, a bit dismissive about the latter. You don't have a degree and never wanted one. You know very well it takes years of experience and training to do what you're doing. Talent is involved too, as some people do have "two left hands". You still feel you should add something to the conversation, but not sure if it is going to be well-received. No need to enlighten the other party right now Most people think in terms of opposites. If it's not this, it's that and it can't be anything else. Certainty of one's convictions is also a form of self-reassurance that everything is stable in one's world. Other points of view cannot be allowed because they are disruptive. Cognitive disrup...
In the past we engaged and ended up heavily bruised. Now we think we know better and breathe in before we try to move on the conversation. It doesn't work. We bail out, cowardly.
The only source of relief is found after scurrying towards some Stoic quotes.
Epitectus has an answer for the pressing question: who or what is pulling my strings?
Anything that we set out our heart on or want to avoid has the controls of our inner peace. Bit pathetic, really. Expectations are our masters.
If every encounter involves as much mental preparation as going into a war zone, no wonder some prefer infrequent human contact and even give it up completely.
Stoics advise against isolation though. Resilience needs scars and battles won, so that it is a badge of honour rather than a genetic gift.
No wonder human interaction has been steadily moving into digital territories. 'Block', 'mute', 'swipe left or right' - has anyone tried to count how how often they are used across one channel or another?
A lot, I suspect.
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