Prequel (as they say in the movie industry): a few days after publishing this post, I came across an advertisement that contained the very idea I had written about. Actually the very phrase, 'time-in'. Synchronicity is very real. Glad to find out others think the same.
|The missing toy|
Child has a tantrum. Child starts screaming. Parent has no idea why and prosecutorial interrogation does not work.
"Why are you shouting? Why are you not listening? Why?"
Most adults don't have any trouble explaining why they are moody, irritable or simply unpleasant. "I'm stressed" is the generic label for a variety of deeper feelings and emotions, as well as pure biological reasons, such as lack of sleep.
Are grown-ups being told to have a time-out when they behave like their children? God forbid, they're grown-ups.
Kids are not basketball players. Time-out, shouted by the coach and meant to break a free fall in players' tactics and successive mistakes, is perfectly justified in team sports.
It has no place in child-rearing. That's not a game, there is no opposing team and the only coach is life.
More importantly, when a parent orders time-out for an unruly child, the game clock does not stop. All that time wasted on seeking reasons and admonishing, could be spent playing.
Playing is time-in, in the moment.